Pegging for the first time can feel like a daunting undertaking. But have no fear, pegging can be quite enjoyable and there’s no reason as to why you and your partner shouldn’t take the dive. But how do you go about safely trying pegging for the first time with your partner?
First, let’s define pegging.
Pegging is the act in which a person without a penis penetrates someone with a penis anally by use of strap-on. Someone already comfortable with self anal play might want to give it a try as an extension of that exploration. Pegging is pleasurable to all parties involved and is a beautiful way to delight in a different sexual dynamic and sensation.
Open the Conversation
Everything introduced to your partner(s) must first start with an open conversation. If you have been curious about pegging and want to try it with your partner, sit them down at a comfortable time and bring it up to them. Talk about why you’d like to give it a try and be sure to talk about any hesitations or curiosities that accompany the act of pegging ahead of performing the act itself. This is not a practice that you just spring on your partner.
Start by using fingers or plugs (and lots of lube) during your partnered play. Starting small not only gets all parties used to anal play in the bedroom, but also allows you adequate practice in preparing yourself for inserting something a bit larger. It’s easier to talk about pegging enthusiastically if anal play is already a part of your fun!
There is nothing to be ashamed about with regard to anal exploration. It can be incredibly pleasurable for both yourself, and your partner(s).
Ease Into It
As mentioned above, starting with smaller anal play such as fingers or anal plugs helps ease you into pegging. These small toys are often used before the strap-on is brought out as a way to better prepare both of you.
I recommend shopping together for all of the essentials. Shopping with your partners brings you closer together during the process of exploration and helps to make the entire experience more comfortable for everyone. Shopping together also opens up conversation about does and doesn’t turn you on. Above all, have fun finding a comfortable plug and suitable lubrication that you’d like to try with your partner in the bedroom.
What Do You Need?
When you both have decided that you’re going to try pegging, it’s important to get all of the necessary supplies. Thankfully, there are a great many pegging toys to add to your pegging essentials list that are body-safe, and great for beginners.
First, choose an anal lubricant. When using silicone dildos or plugs it’s important to lean more towards a water-based lubricant or a hybrid lube as they react best with the silicone of the toy. Once you have found your perfect lubrication for play, it’s time to find your pegging harness and toy!
Harnesses come in a great many styles depending on you or your partners preference. If you enjoy adjustable straps, there are plenty that will allow for a fully adjustable experience to keep the dildo tight against your body. But there is also the option of a harness brief that is comfortable for longer-term wear. Ensure that whatever strap-on you choose, it has an interchangeable O-ring that allows you to swap out different dildos. That way you can delight in other shapes and sizes as your pegging journey evolves.
Now you need the pegging dildo itself. I recommend finding a slim, silicone dildo to start. This will allow you to adjust to the new sensation and size while also not pushing yourself too far and causing discomfort.
How Do You Do It?
Now that you’ve had the conversation and have obtained all the items necessary to begin, it’s time to get down to business! But how do you begin pegging?
Always start with anal foreplay. Ensure that you are using lubrication on any fingers or toys that you are using to prepare yourself for the dildo. Lay on your back with your legs raised or in doggystyle position to best access the anus.
After you are internally lubricated and teasing has loosened you up comfortably, it’s time to ease into pegging. I recommend having the person wearing the strap-on ease in only the first inch of the toy. Allow the person receiving the pegging to move their body against the toy and take it at a depth and speed that is most comfortable to them.
At the point of full insertion the wearer can then feel comfortable to thrust at a speed and depth that both have agreed to. It’s important to understand that this can be incredibly pleasurable for both parties but must be done safely and eased into so as not to cause discomfort. There is an amazing product called the Ohnut that can help you manage and even eliminate discomfort during sex by allowing you to easily customize how deep penetration goes.
If you want a little added fun, bring in a toy that vibrates! Vibrations can feel incredible against the prostate and will add something extra to your playtime. Many different dildos have vibrating options and are still harness compatible. There are even quite a few vibrating butt plugs that can be used to warm up.
Don’t forget the after care!
Pegging can be quite intense for a beginner and it’s important to always take care of each other after the act. After care means a lot of things to a lot of people, so ensure you converse about what makes you most comfortable.
Other Precautions
Poop is a thing. It is a huge reason why many people hesitate when it comes to pegging. This is a very real possibility but there are ways to reduce the chance of this happening during pegging play.
It’s important to know that you’re not going to actually poop on the dildo - but there could be trace amounts on the dildo during play. Use a warm water enema before play or take a shower and place a finger inside of yourself while cleaning. This can lessen the chances that you will actually see poop. It’s important to remember that this is nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed over. We have a wide selection of anal health products so that you can find what is most suitable for you.
Make sure you go slow and ease your way up to the actual use of a dildo as mentioned above. Going slowly will prevent pain during play. Use lots (and I mean lots) of lube, communicate regularly with your partner about what you are feeling and your needs, and take it easy! But above all… Have fun!
